Ghetto Pass: Valentine's Day at White Castle

The Assimilated Negro is the issuing authority for your own personal Ghetto Pass, helping you safely navigate among the people and places of browner territories. » 2/15/07 1:20pm 2/15/07 1:20pm

Ghetto Pass: True Negro Confessions 1

Ghetto Pass is on sabbatical. Here, after the colon, and third comma, is your new feature summary written in small type: » 2/08/07 11:10am 2/08/07 11:10am

Ghetto Pass: Exit Plan

The Assimilated Negro is the issuing authority for your own personal Ghetto Pass, helping you safely navigate among the people and places of browner territories. » 2/01/07 4:10pm 2/01/07 4:10pm

Smells Like Negro Musk

Ghetto Pass correspondent The Assimilated Negro weighs in on yesterday's groundbreaking NYT coverage of black people who listen to white people music (which, the paper helpfully informs you, was actually invented by black people. His report follows. » 1/29/07 11:50am 1/29/07 11:50am

See, this is where the shirks their responsibility and we step in…

Ghetto Pass Classic: The Cipher

The Assimilated Negro is the issuing authority for your own personal Ghetto Pass, helping you safely navigate among the people and places of browner territories. » 1/25/07 1:00pm 1/25/07 1:00pm

Ghetto Pass: The Last Ghetto

The Assimilated Negro is the issuing authority for your own personal Ghetto Pass, helping you safely navigate among the people and places of browner territories. » 1/18/07 3:40pm 1/18/07 3:40pm

Ghetto Pass: Recreational Activities

The Assimilated Negro is the issuing authority for your own personal Ghetto Pass, helping you safely navigate among the people and places of browner territories. » 1/11/07 4:00pm 1/11/07 4:00pm

Ghetto Pass: The Ghetto Chicken Spot

The Assimilated Negro is the issuing authority for your own personal Ghetto Pass, helping you safely navigate among the people and places of browner territories. » 1/04/07 12:10pm 1/04/07 12:10pm

Ghetto Pass: New Year's Resolutions

The Assimilated Negro is the issuing authority for your own personal Ghetto Pass, helping you safely navigate among the people and places of browner territories. » 12/28/06 3:25pm 12/28/06 3:25pm

Ghetto Pass Person of the Year: You, Caucasians

The Assimilated Negro is the issuing authority for your own personal Ghetto Pass, helping you safely navigate among the people and places of browner territories. » 12/21/06 12:10pm 12/21/06 12:10pm

Ghetto Pass 2.0: The Long Tail of Street Entrepreneurs

The Assimilated Negro is the issuing authority for your own personal Ghetto Pass, helping you safely navigate among the people and places of browner territories. » 12/15/06 1:20pm 12/15/06 1:20pm

Ghetto Pass: Ghetto Pickup Artists

The Assimilated Negro is the issuing authority for your own personal Ghetto Pass, helping you safely navigate among the people and places of browner territories. » 12/07/06 1:50pm 12/07/06 1:50pm

Ghetto Pass: Livery "Gypsy" Cabs

The Assimilated Negro is the issuing authority for your own personal Ghetto Pass, helping you safely navigate among the people and places of browner territories. » 11/30/06 3:15pm 11/30/06 3:15pm

Ghetto Pass: The Corner Bodega

The Assimilated Negro is the issuing authority for your own personal Ghetto Pass, helping you safely navigate among the people and places of browner territories. » 11/16/06 3:10pm 11/16/06 3:10pm

Ghetto Pass: The Ghetto Chinese Spot

The Assimilated Negro is the issuing authority for your own personal Ghetto Pass, helping you safely navigate among the people and places of browner territories. » 11/09/06 12:50pm 11/09/06 12:50pm

Gawker's Week In Review: Michael Noer, Lady Charmer

• Say it with us, all together now, No Moer Noer, No Moer Noer!! Million Career-Woman March on Sunday, make sure you bring your igallop.
• The NY Post thinks duplication is the sincerest form of flattery. The NY Post thinks duplication is the sincerest form of flattery.
• We put you up on Diddy's love of bacon & egg… » 8/25/06 7:00pm 8/25/06 7:00pm

Remainders: Astronomers Rescind Pluto's Planet Privileges, NYC Remains…

• 2500 astronomers from 75 countries decide Pluto isn't a planet, but a dwarf planet. Copernicus has no comment. [CNN]
• 250,000 women from 1 country decide Michael Noer isn't a dick, but a COLOSSAL dick. Everyone continues to comment. [The American Prospect]
• Do The Killers need to be taken down a peg? Two new songs… » 8/25/06 5:42pm 8/25/06 5:42pm

We'd Prefer To Set The Record For Staying Off The Subway, But That's…

To follow-up on our transit transients who intended to break the record for most egregious waste of time fastest ride through the entire NYC subway system, covering all of 230 miles in the process. » 8/25/06 5:00pm 8/25/06 5:00pm

To Do: Pharmacists, Naughty Prep School Stories, or Dr. Dog

Friday:
• 1) Ted Leo and his anthemic Pharmacists make their annual stopover at
South Street Seaport tonight, this time with "ruffian punks" DC
Snipers and "hype brewing rock kids" Tokyo Police Club. Nothing quite
so punk like politically-charged lyrics on a quaint tourist-mobbed
Pier. [flavorpill]
• 2) If ever you… » 8/25/06 3:50pm 8/25/06 3:50pm